SPOOF SPACE BY STEELE CODDINGTON | JANUARY 21, 2015
Blessings on the Charlies of the world
First, our prayers go out to the families and friends of our brother and sister satirists, cartoonists and employees at Charlie Hebdo weekly newspaper in France. We salute the courage represented by the spirit of the commitment to freedom of human expression. Small weekly newspapers all over the world, like Charlie, are a special gift to the public as local watchdogs and as sources for the expression of conscience.
Satire, ridicule, spoof and their often irreverent revelations of truths are a special format of communication, presented with humor, wit, shock and courage to expose stupidity, arrogance, implausibility, entrenched power, ideas, wrong-headedness, ideology, incompetence and on and on interminably. The intention is to disturb complacency, upset status-quo, wake up minds, grab attention and to try to right a wrong. It epitomizes the idea of free speech and in a free society the tolerance for it is reasonable control because of slander and libel. The ultimate determination of its acceptance or rejection is left to a public that is free to decide its vulgarity, indecency, taste, fairness, joy or baloney status.
In the spirit of satire we have to confess the Spoof Space column has always been reluctant to alienate any individual group, religion or asylum that wants to separate our heads from the rest of our body. We strongly support attachment and that is why we hire so many talented animals for our Board of Directors. They write and approve all the controversial stuff and are all protected by the SPCA (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals). The Society will soon open a branch for Jihadists in the ISIS's new Caliphate to help retrain all the animals running around in human bodies.
My dog Arbuckle, a brilliant Border Collie, specializes in the peculiarity of acronyms. As you know he was a founder of PETA, an acronym for People for the Ethical Treatment of Arbuckle, a very self-serving non-profit approved by the IRS for its assistance in locating fire hydrants. Most religions love dogs because they can guide the blind and protect the innocent by sniffing out explosives carried by suicide bombers.
Arbuckle appreciates the subtle dog significance of the word GOD spelled backwards and knows that front-wards it isn't an acronym for GOOD OLD DOG. After all, dog religion is based on dogma that naturally rejects the inhumanity of Jihad. Reasonably sane men pray, "Lord help me be the person my dog thinks I am." Everyone knows dogs are men's best friend.
Then there's Queenie, my lovable, quick thinking, flatulation-oriented mare. As an old girl, she's in charge of vulgarity, methane, animal cartoons and manure – a word we've discovered mischievous kids love to change because it's so much fun to yell "horse-poo" instead. Queenie recently, as animal cartoon editor, decided the Cartoon of the Year Award should go Invertors Business Daily's Michael Ramirez for his recent rendering of Obama being hugged by former President Jimmy Carter. An ecstatic Carter hugs a "Thank-you" as he displays a newspaper bearing the headline, "Carter no longer worst Prez."
All horses, as any horse owner knows, have a mysterious sixth sense. It's a gift from horse heaven and gives them extra sensory perception. One of the things they know, Queenie revealed to me, was that murderous Islamic Jihadists who think they are going to paradise, will find the virgins are all female centaurs, lovely creatures, half horse and half woman. And the paradise Jihadists so cruelly sought will bring justice by forcing them to wear a burka while forever chasing a virgin they can never catch.
