Spoof Space
BY STEELE CODDINGTON | FEBRUARY 15, 2012
A spoof is like an electric fence
Spoof Space International, Inc., my boss, received a letter from Uzbekistan inquiring about the meaning of the word “Spoof” as in Spoof Space. Before we clear that up, we wanted to explain to our highly intelligent readers that Uzbekistan, like many American cities and states recently in the news – Buffalo, Detroit, Illinois, California – is so totally broke through liberal government handouts, mismanagement, corruption, government employee unions, favoritism and outrageous taxes that it is essentially dysfunctional. Smart people in those American places are moving out of their government cesspools to right-to-work and no-income-tax states that are also not infected with governors like Jon Corzine or Jerry Brown.
Spoof: To mock someone or something by light or good humored parody or lampoon. Spoof is a humorous brother to ridicule. It tends to scoff rather than ridicule, which tends to cause contemptuous laughter or derision, to make fun of, with intent to humiliate good naturedly or contemptuously. When spoof reaches the level of ridicule, it’s because, like most people, the spoofer believes the punishment should fit the crime. It should be commensurate with the degree of stupidity that is its subject.
Spoof or ridicule creates better health, helping people release their mental antipathies. Rather than just throwing up, they begin to understand the idiocies advocated by dumb-heads. It is especially appropriate to expose abuse of power by legislators who regularly practice insanity – defined by Albert Einstein as “continuing to try the same failures over and over again and expect different outcomes,” or words to that effect! Good examples might be shovel-ready stimulus projects that sounded great but didn’t create jobs. You know, like stimulating your horse by telling him, “I’m here with a shovel, ready for you even if you’re constipated.” Or thanking tax payers for their enthusiastic participation in tax increases to spread the wealth when even Karl Marx knew it’s impossible to multiply wealth by dividing it. And wasn’t it Dr. Spock who said, “Ask a nursing baby if he or she is happy if forced to share the other half of the supply apparatus with a complete stranger?” (Didn’t Karl Marx go on to become Obama’s Education Czar – causing thrills to vibrate up and down the legs of the NEA?)
And a final insanity, a new form of segregation. Not by race or religion, but by how much you earn. We can’t call it discrimination. So let’s call it “fairness.” We rulers will decide who is rich and whose income gets whacked. And following that, will decide who has to wear a burka. Share-the-wealth is not a matter of “fairness,” it’s an Obama oxymoron for “Robbing Peter to pay Paul.”
Will Rogers, one of America’s greatest “philosophers,” spoofed people with common sense sayings to mock stupidity. “Never squat while wearing your spurs,” and “Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.” Both suitable metaphors for liberal “solutions” like the Solyndra or Fast and Furious screw-ups. But Will Roger’s best spoof could be perfect for people who voted for Obama and are now experiencing “shocking” regret:
There are three kinds of men:
• The ones that learn by reading
• The few who learn by observation
• The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
The good wife
One winter morning a husband and his blonde wife in Detroit, Michigan were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snow plows can get through." So the good wife went out and moved her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snow plows can get through." The good wife went out and moved her car again.
The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park..."
Then the electric power went out. The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "Damn honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snow plows can get through?"
With love and understanding in his voice the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"
Coffee hurts
I was eating lunch on the 20th of February last year with a friend and her 6-year-old granddaughter. She was pretty animated as she talked about school and friends and teachers.
As I sipped my coffee, I asked her, "What day is tomorrow?"
She said "It's President's Day!"
She is a smart kid. So, I asked "What does President's Day mean?" I waited for her reply about Washington or Lincoln, etc.
She replied, "President's Day is when President Obama steps out of the White House, and if he sees his shadow we have one more year of unemployment."
You know, it hurts when hot coffee spurts out your nose.
Puzzle Solutions
For All Signs: Mercury, ancient messenger god, is unusually busy throughout this week. This suggests most of us will be preoccupied with communication of one form or another. There may be many phone calls, messages, letters, quick conversations, rapid decisions, contracts and/or papers to write. The period is favorable for probing into causes and accessing the bottom line to any matter. Beware of the tendency to jump to conclusions or take action before all the facts are clear. Remind yourself of how the old "gossip" game is played and don't take what you hear very seriously until you have found at least a second reliable source.