A Change Of Pace



Mullet Over
Not all ridiculous wars occur in modern times

By James K. White | July 30, 2008

mullet overThe Olympic Games have twice been hosted in Los Angeles – 1932 and 1984. More than 10,000 athletes from 140 countries competed in the 1984 events.

Most golfers know that one under par for a hole is called a birdie and two under is called an eagle, but many are not aware that three under par is termed to be an albatross. I’ve been called an albatross, but I have never observed one in golf competition. I could tell you a lot about bogies.

If you are afflicted with ophidiophobia, you are afraid of snakes.

Edward Jenner (1749-1823) is credited with discovering the life saving effects of vaccinations. His initial studies were intended to combat the devastating disease known as smallpox. Smallpox was such an effective killer of humans that infected items were used instead of bullets, etc. during wartime. Entire tribes of Native Americans were reportedly killed off by smallpox infections. On May 8, 1980 the World Health Organization declared smallpox to be eradicated as a disease (some samples were kept in laboratories).

Adult humans (unless they have spent too much time in bars) usually have four basic types of teeth: incisors (8), canines (4), bicuspids (8), and molars (12). Third molars (also called wisdom teeth) emerge in some people between the ages of 17 and 25. Mostly wisdom teeth cause people trouble unless one is an oral surgeon wherein wisdom teeth can cause wealth.

The mythical creature called a griffin had the head and wings of an eagle with the ears of a horse. Griffins had the bodies of lions and usually spent their days and nights guarding hoards of gold.

Do not think that all ridiculous wars occur in modern times. Back in the sixth century an Irish priest named Columba was permitted access to copy Finnian’s book of Psalms. Everything was fine until the copy was finished and then a major dispute arose as to who was to have possession of the new copy. Columba wanted it, but so did Finnian. The argument got out of hand and two factions formed that actually went to battle. Thousands were killed at the resulting Battle of Cul Dreimhne (561). Columba (also called Columcille) got to keep the copy.

In 1860 approximately two thirds of America’s export monies were derived from cotton. By 1900 the United States had become the world’s largest producer of coal, iron, and steel. Most economists concur that the nation had also become the world’s leading economic power. Things were not going so well in Germany. After World War I, inflation in Germany was the worst ever. One U.S. dollar was evaluated at one trillion (1,000,000,000,000) German marks in 1923.

Fifty-nine men signed the Declaration of Independence. Charles Carroll was the last surviving signer when he died in 1832 at the age of ninety-five.

Well, reach some sort of understanding before you copy a book and I’ll see you next time.

GBA

A few good stories about men


Men are better friends
Friendship between Women:

A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband she had slept over at her girlfriend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew about it.
Friendship between Men:
A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a buddy's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed that he was still there.

Top 10 reasons men prefer guns over women
10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.
9. You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the road.
8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.
7. Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.
6. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.
5. A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.
4. Guns function normally every day of the month.
3. A gun doesn't ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?"
2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.
AND ... The number one reason a gun is favored over a woman ...
1. You can buy a silencer for a gun

Only a Texas man can make you feel like a woman

A plane passed through a severe storm. The turbulence was awful, and things went from bad to worse when one wing was struck by lightning.
One woman lost it completely. She stood up in the front of the plane and screamed, "I'm too young to die," she cried. Then she yelled, "If I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! Is there anyone on this plane who can make me feel like a woman?"
For a moment, there was silence. Everyone stared at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then a man from Texas stood up in the rear of the plane. He was handsome, tall, well built, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. Slowly, he started to walk up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt as he went, one button at a time. No one moved. He removed his shirt. Muscles rippled across his chest. She gasped ...
Then, he spoke ...
"Iron this – and then get me a beer."

And a few quickies ...
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving